Written By Randi on ·
March 30, 2018
The lessons I have learned through my infertility journey have been hard but necessary. I am comforted by the words of 1 Peter 5:10:
“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.”
Lessons are not fun while you’re in the trial, but when we’re able to look back on what we’ve learned, it makes our God so big, and our problems at the time so little. I’m thankful for the trials that build my character, and grow my faith.
LESSONS LEARNED FROM INFERTILITY:
I don’t think there is any lesson I learned more than surrendering to the Father through my infertility journey. Surrendering my dream of having a child. Surrendering my disappointments. Surrendering my timing. It has been a very long season of surrender. This is such a hard lesson because I want to be in control. I like making my own plans and I just want God to bless them. But that’s not how He works. He wants to bless us with His plans. Therefore, we surrender to Him. The Lord says “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.” (Psalm 33:8) Learning how to let Him guide me, and having absolutely no control, has been life-transforming.
It’s so easy to say that we trust in the Lord. But how much do we trust Him when He continues to say no to our prayers? Can we trust Him when He has spoken a word into our lives, but He has yet to fulfill it? Can we trust Him when our prayer is for something good, and pure, yet He continues to withhold it from us? Do we believe the Word when it says “Nothing is too hard for the Lord”? That has been the Word I’ve been standing on the past 3 years. I knew without a doubt that God could give us a child if He chose to do so. I just did not know when it would be, or if He was choosing that for us.
I’ve learned how to trust that His timing is better than ours.
I can look back over this journey and see why the timing was not right until now. The first procedure we did was right before my last semester of college, where I took 5 classes, worked full time and led a Bible Study. I was so stressed that semester and I can only imagine the stress of a pregnancy. I probably would have dropped out of my last semester. GOD KNEW.
The 2nd procedure we did was right when Corey changed jobs to real estate. It was a stressful time because our income dropped significantly as we waited for Corey’s commissions to come it. We were stressed financially and emotionally. I contemplated getting a 2nd job. Corey did get a 2nd job. That would not have been the right time to think about spending money on a baby. GOD KNEW.
I just love how God sees the big picture and we just have to trust that He knows what’s best for us.
Oh patience… I have a love-hate relationship with you! I want to be a patient person, but I hate learning the lesson. You’ve heard it said before, don’t ever pray for patience because God will teach you patience. Well trust me, I have not prayed for patience. But He taught me anyways. Waiting on the Lord will always reap a reward. I think I am more grateful for our reward (baby) than I would have been had He given it to me right away. God knows I need things to be taught in extreme ways. I’m a drama queen in that way. J
God has truly increased my faith through this journey. Someone spoke into our lives about 2 years ago saying that we needed to speak life into our child. They said we should name them and pray for them by name. We should thank the Lord for them. We should “call those things that are not as though they are.” (Romans 4:17) So that’s what we did. And through each disappointment, our faith grew as we kept believing that God was giving us a child.
Power of Prayer
I cannot tell you how much my prayer life has grown deeper over the past few years. I believe God uses trials to draw us closer to Him. My prayers were full of pleading, begging and grieving. Now my prayer continues into thankfulness and praise, rather than crying out to Him for help. The real test of our prayer life is how it continues after the trial ends. Do we continue to praise Him when the good times come? I just can’t stop praising Him! I am still overwhelmed with gratefulness that He is allowing me to be a mother.
I am thankful for this season of infertility that God has given me. My relationship with Him has grown deeper and my need for Him has grown significantly! God will work all things together for good, for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. It’s hard to see this while in the midst of the trial, but this should give every one of us hope that there is good coming, if we remain steadfast.
June 21, 2013 It’s 5am. God woke me up this morning at 4am and told me to pray. I didn’t feel like getting out of bed yet so I just laid there and tried to go back to sleep. Of course that didn’t happen, cause when God wakes you up, it’s for a reason and […]
June 9, 2013 I always loved the scripture in Malachi 3:10 where God says “Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store […]
May 20, 2013 Yesterday I went to visit my old stopping grounds with my mom… South Mac Church of Christ. I finally found a church where I felt at home and loved from the moment I walked in the door! I’ve been searching for the right church, with no luck. I loved Watermark because the […]
May 14, 2013 Has there ever been a time in your life where you knew you were not where you wanted to be and you are pretty sure how you got to where you are, but you don’t know how to get to where you want to be? Has there ever been a time when […]
May 14, 2013 Last night was our first meeting for Hidden Treasures Prison Ministry! It was a great meeting! I am so excited about this new opportunity that God is bringing in my life! Even if they don’t let me back in prison, I will still find a way to get to those women in […]
May 6, 2013 I know I am a horrible blogger these days! Even this blog has sat on my computer for a week waiting to be finished! I just don’t sit down and find the time to write about anything! I rarely am even journaling. All these things that I had planned on doing […]
April 22, 2013 Let me just say how good God is! And how right on time He is at ALL times! Last week He brought a gift into my life that I had been needing and yearning for since I got out of prison. Although I have a great support group and great friends in […]
April 12, 2013 This morning I am reading in Joshua. I seem to find myself in Joshua 23 a lot. I think the Lord is very serious about these commands. Joshua 23:9-13 says: “The Lord has driven out before you great and powerful nations; to this day no one has been able to withstand you. One of you routs […]