Opportunities – Do we discern when they arise? This is the absolutely the hardest time I’ve ever done. Somehow I ended up at Tangipahoa Parish Jail instead of West Baton Rouge. I think there has been a mistake! They shouldn’t be allowed to keep people here. When I got here the first thing I saw was that 5 girls are locked down in a 2 man cell for bringing crack in and smoking it. There are people sleeping on mats on the floor because there aren’t enough beds. Two girls have been bitten by a brown recluse spider. There are not cleaning supplies. You don’t sit on the toilet. The one sheet I was given was tattered and dirty. The blanket has holes in it. I feel dirty sitting at the table right now. There are a few books to read – no Bibles. The first night here was rough. There are 8 women in my cell. They talked all through the night. But where I come from they don’t call it talking they call it yelling. The lights kept coming back on cause they were bringing more people in. Every time someone new would come in, they’d strike up a conversation and I’d have to fall asleep all over again. The second night was even worse. I was already asleep before the lights went off. And when everyone else came to bed they wanted to party. They started off by saying a loud prayer. I was good with that – let’s pray together and go to bed. But then they wanted to sing Kum-ba-ya. No Kidding! They sang” Dorm 18 neds you Lord-come by here…come by here, Lord, come by here.” Then they went through every name in the dorm-then every boyfriends name – then every kids name. And I’m all for singing praises to God – you know I am! But they were screaming it and the song went on for about 30 minutes while everybody else was trying to sleep. It started to get frustrating! When they were finished singing I silently said “Thank you God!” But they weren’t done. They were done praising God – and ready to move to the real party. They went straight into talking dirty – cussing and yelling. They yelled at each other for 2 hours before they finally decided to go to sleep.
It was so hard not to get angry! I felt God telling me to talk to Him since I was already awake. But I couldn’t concentrate on anything. So I prayed over and over “Get me out of here!” That’s all that came to mind! “Free me from my prison so I can praise Your name!” This morning is Sunday and they have church on the TV. And of course I got a word already! It was about opportunities. Do we recognize them? Do we take advantage of them? Do we discern what we are supposed to be doing when opportunity arises? Are we being the servant God has made us to be? I’m gonna have to sy it is hard to see any opportunities here. It’s hard to want to take advantage of them. I know I’m being selfish because it is so miserable here. I just want out of this place. I’m hoping I get to go to court his week and can convince them to move me to Baton Rouge where I was before. I don’t know if I can stay calm much longer in this place.